Identity: Who are you?
Remember Childhood?
What’s your name? is a question used frequently when entering new environments. Names communicate your identity. “Who are you?” is not at the top of the list of things asked when I observe my children playing with others. Their first questions tend to include, “Do you want to play?”, “What are you doing?”, or “Wanna race?” Let me acknowledge, my children are all male and deep relational bonding is not a priority to them when it comes to playing.
Identity seems to flow naturally in the budding of childhood friendships. It’s summed up in whether or not the other person will join in the fun. There’s a beauty and simplicity in the interaction of children that can get lost in adulthood. Self-doubt, relational hurts, and fear of what others think so easily sabotage confidence in one’s self. But we too have experienced the beauty of getting to know someone over time, their true identity. Have you ever had someone you know point out something about yourself that you didn’t even realize? It can be surprising, endearing or even illuminating.
Recognizing True Identity
We, as people, bear the image of God (Genesis 1:27). This truth is each person’s true identity. It begins with knowing who God is and who you are as an individual. King David tells us God formed us and we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139). When it comes to identity, the origin of man can be lost in today’s culture, but as believers, it is important to remember the source of our identity is God.
God is infinite and multidimensional and as bearers of his image, each person is a multifaceted being with dimensions that may not be easily observed. Ethnicity, race, age, gender, language, ability, personality, education, and experience are just a sampling of identifiers that make up the beautiful complexity of an individual’s identity.
Identifiers Give Greater Context Not Confine Individuals
These identifiers can be helpful, but it is also tempting to look for an identifier for the purpose of placing someone or a group within a box that is labeling and limiting. If we are not careful, identifiers can be weaponized as all we know about a person, instead of seeking to understand and know them as a whole.
Within the Imago Dei Process, we take individuals and teams through what we call, “The PRISM Activity”. This activity helps to ground the concept of each of us being multidimensional. Recognizing and honoring each person as an image bearer goes a long way in creating paths to belonging in the spaces you occupy. Remember a person’s identity is more than what you can see. Their identity is also found in what they share about themselves which can break up harmful stereotypes.
Curiosity Can be a Gateway
Here’s a quick story. I have a friend who is above average in height…he’s tall. When talking beyond the surface identifier of being tall, he said he wished people wouldn’t assume he was mean simply because of his stature. Knowing this about my friend came from being curious and allowing him to share what he wanted. Assumptions can be harmful.
What have you learned about the new family or individual to your community that is a dimension of their unique diversity? How have you demonstrated curiosity and allowed individuals to share as they feel comfortable thereby eradicating assumptions? At Imago Dei, we use relational coaching to teach the importance of understanding your identity and recognizing the multifaceted nature of others within your community. By acknowledging and giving space for an individual's identity you honor our Creator and cultivate a space where people feel invited and ultimately where they belong.
Reflective Question: How does being an image bearer of God impact your thoughts on yourself and your thoughts about others?
